have mercy.

in mid-July, the summer-resident barn swallows who had successfully raised and launched four fledglings by June 23rd, 2025, attempted to raise a second brood;

while i am not absolutely sure if it was the same set of parents or another in the barn swallow community that utilized the nest — as there is a collective of more than a dozen swallows that visits and assists in feeding sometimes too — it is most likely they are the same parent pair;

this is the second summer the barn swallows have nested here in my barn — using last year’s well-constructed nest which they attached to one of the joists like a balcony cantilevered on a Chicago highrise;

i began leaving the overhead barn door open when i first noticed them circling and investigating the barn a few years back; and i was thrilled last year when they began construction of their nest — they were so very welcomed and wanted here — i now know to leave the barn door raised from mid May through July to give them access.



the first brood of four swallows,
not quite fledged, but stretching their wings in the safety of the barn, June 2025

Continue reading “have mercy.”

as the crow flies, as the apple falls.

i watched Aftersun,

making my way thru films, on lists, i’ve apparently missed


when it ended,
it was 12:34 am
as i glanced at the clock on the stove;
and went outside
to sit on the dark stoop and cry
and then, said aloud,


“i am not okay”,

and i may never be, again;

i saw, i am more like my father,

than my mother,

than i knew, than i ever thought,

and that, is stunning, in itself ///

that he, was more the human being, of the two, than her.

Continue reading “as the crow flies, as the apple falls.”